Artie was so furious when ants infested the chocolate cake at their
Memorial Day picnic, he vowed vengeance. He told his three cousins
what happened.
“Let’s find out where the bastards live,” Billy said, “and wreck the place.”
“How are we gonna do that?” asked Chucky.
“We can use this cherry bomb, said Danny.
All agreed, except Chucky. He liked ants. Especially after his mom
told him how hard they worked. He figured ants were far better than
his dad, who was always drunk and jobless. Refusing to participate in
the ant massacre, he stayed behind.
Artie, Billy, and Danny followed the line of ants into the woods.
While they searched for the anthill, Billy said, “My dad told me that
somebody killed an elephant in the Bronx Zoo with a cherry bomb.
Blood and guts were all over the place for a whole mile. Just think
what it’ll do to a bunch of crummy ants.”
“It’ll be like an atomic bomb,” Danny said.
“Look,” Artie said, “there’s the anthill.”
The boys didn’t know that a civil war had recently ended between two
ant factions. The winners formed the world’s first ant republic.
They ratified a constitution and held presidential elections. Their new
President had been sworn in that very morning.
Had the kids looked carefully through a powerful magnifying glass,
they would have noticed tuxedoed and beautifully gowned ants entering
the anthill to attend the Inaugural Ball. And had they examined ants
coming from the picnic, they would noticed their waiter uniforms and
the chocolate cake morsels they’d brought for the Inaugural Banquet.
Artie placed the cherry bomb on top of the anthill. Billy adjusted
the bomb to make sure it was directly over the entrance. Danny lit the
fuse.
Countless celebrating ants died. Ant blood and guts were strewn for
a mile. Some of it fell on Chucky’s head as he sat at the picnic
table. Wiping off the gunk, he noticed it consisted of bloody heads,
arms, legs, and guts. He wept over the carnage.
Though temporarily disoriented by the surprise attack and horrendous
damage, the Ant Intelligence Network, AIN, sprang into action. They
summoned their vast network of secret informants.
That night, a million AIN agents invaded every boy’s bedroom in town.
They dusted the boys’ fingers for traces of firecracker gunpowder.
Considering 1,320 boys lived in town, they figured the task would take
all night. However during the first hour, the AIN Director sent a
message ordering all his agents to drop what they were doing and
converge on the apartments occupied by Artie, Billy, and Danny.
When dusted with AIN’s forensic chemicals, the boys’ fingers turned
electric blue. This wouldn’t have happened if they’d obeyed their
mothers and washed their hands before going to bed.
Before sunrise, Artie, Bill, and Danny exploded simultaneously.
Their blood and guts were spread everywhere for a mile.
Everybody wondered how such a horrible thing could happen to three, cute kids.
But the ants knew. They too had cherry bombs in their arsenals.
Using their legendary strength and vast numbers, they’d rolled a
cherry bomb into each boy's mouth, while he slept.
* * *
Sixty years later, Chucky’s great-grandchildren asked him to tell
them scary stories, as they sat around a campfire. He told them the
one about the guy who blew up an elephant with a cherry bomb. They
squealed with pleasure when they heard how blood and guts were strewn
for a mile in all directions. The kids enjoyed the story so much,
they clamored for more. Chucky then told them about his three cousins
who'd suffered the same fate at the hands of the Ant Intelligence
Network.
The kids didn’t believe him.
Until he showed the citations and medals he received from AIN for squealing on his three cousins.
The Cherry Bomb
Michael A. Kechula is a retired technical writer who has authored two books of flash and micro-fiction: “A Deck Full of Zombies--61 Speculative Fiction Tales” and “Crazy Stories for Crazy People.”